Castle Part 2: Castle Harder

Dear Auntie Moonbeam

Last time I posted about this castle project I went off on a weird tangent about medieval contractors and the hassles they must have faced during construction.

This time as I was taking the finished pictures I was reminded of a real estate agent trying to get staging shots for a listing.  Man, imagine how hard it woulda been for one of those guys or gals in the Dark Ages!

I Imagine their positive spin to go something like this:

A must see!! Property includes freshly dug courtyard well, perfect for those long sieges!

Castle well

Grounds also include charming and cosy guest castle. Ideal for hosting the in-laws!!

Castle mini

Personalized castle decor (owner willing to negotiate redecoration pending new coat of arms)

Castle banner

Friendly neighbourhood dragon! (Note: friendliness not guaranteed.)

Castle dragon

Completely unrelated to the above notation – Buyer is advised to obtain fire insurance.

Castle dragon 2

Large upper storey picture windows – great views out of all windows.  Be advised: due to recent accidental defenestration buyers are recommended to remain six feet back from windows at all times.


For all you Harry Potter fans out there – property comes with moving staircases!  In fact thanks to plastic dowel construction they pop right out!

Castle stairs

This is your dream house! Close to fairgrounds, jousting pitch and serf’s village!! Only hours to the king’s road!!

Yup, castles musta been a bitch to unload! Fortunately I can report in modern times that is no longer the case – this went over like gangbusters with my little guy!

And finally just for the fun of it let’s take a look at how far we’ve come.

Castle Before and After

Oh yeah, much better! Now, who’s up for some dragon wrangling?


5 thoughts on “Castle Part 2: Castle Harder

  1. Hey bec, This is fantasticallness embodied. Can you make one for me. Monica never lets me play battle with her even when I offer to let her be Robin hood. She doesn’t even consider it!

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